Last night I just could not fall asleep! I tossed and turned and was just wide awake. The last time I looked at the clock it was 1:30. I finally dozed off! Only to have some crazy weird dream that woke me up about 3. Seriously it was weird. Not scary weird. Stupid annoying weird. Ever have one of those dreams. YUCK! So finally about 3:30 I fell back asleep.
Only to be woken up at 5 by someone grabbing my arm. Grabbing my arm really hard. Like I couldn't get away. I was screaming and yanking and couldn't seem to get free. I ended up getting somewhat loose and got the light turned on and came to my senses. It seems my attacker was really myself. I had somehow gotten my arm stuck inside my pillow case and it had fallen asleep so it was really heavy. The more I struggled to get it free the more tangled up it became. Once I quit screaming and realized what was happening I just started laughing. Laughing like a crazy sleep deprived woman.
I didn't even attempt to go back to sleep. I'm praying tonight I don't attack myself and just sleep well....
Monday, January 3, 2011
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Confession
I have a confession to make. I'm sure I'll be judged but I don't care. I just have to be honest. I'll lay it all on the line and bare my soul. I'm brave like that! Here goes!
I absolutely HATE taking my child to church! It is the most stressful parenting experience for me and I dread it with a passion!
But one of the goals for 2011 is to do better about going. He needs to go to church. I'm blaming this on my mom. I know if my mom was alive she would make me take him. So I'm taking him. But I hate it. He is so high energy and all over the place. He can't sit still, he talks and roars, he climbs under pews, he crawls all over me, I can't hear anything, I can't look at the hymnal long enough to actually see what hymn were singing let alone sing it! I hate it! The only little bit of God I get out of church is the prayer I say over and over that I don't beat him during the service. Yeah it's not the least bit enjoyable for me.
But we are going. I keep praying it will get easier. I keep praying one day I'll look over at him in the pew and be glad I took him. Until then I'm going to grit my teeth and push forward. But next week I may drink a little before we head in for the service.
I absolutely HATE taking my child to church! It is the most stressful parenting experience for me and I dread it with a passion!
But one of the goals for 2011 is to do better about going. He needs to go to church. I'm blaming this on my mom. I know if my mom was alive she would make me take him. So I'm taking him. But I hate it. He is so high energy and all over the place. He can't sit still, he talks and roars, he climbs under pews, he crawls all over me, I can't hear anything, I can't look at the hymnal long enough to actually see what hymn were singing let alone sing it! I hate it! The only little bit of God I get out of church is the prayer I say over and over that I don't beat him during the service. Yeah it's not the least bit enjoyable for me.
But we are going. I keep praying it will get easier. I keep praying one day I'll look over at him in the pew and be glad I took him. Until then I'm going to grit my teeth and push forward. But next week I may drink a little before we head in for the service.
Saturday, January 1, 2011
Happy New Year
Another year has come and gone. They seem to go faster the older I get. Funny how that works. We were pretty wild on New Year's Eve! We played with play-doh, made about 3 packets of magic grow dinosaur capsules, and watched Toy Story. I also cleaned my office and did three loads of laundy. Yes wild we are!
I'm not making any resolutions this year. I'm not a fan of them. But with each new year I do make goals for the year. Goals for myself, goals for my business. It helps me stay on track. Nothing huge just a plan to help guide me.
Hope you all had a great New Year's Eve and I hope that 2011 brings all of us many blessings and lots of laughter!
I'm not making any resolutions this year. I'm not a fan of them. But with each new year I do make goals for the year. Goals for myself, goals for my business. It helps me stay on track. Nothing huge just a plan to help guide me.
Hope you all had a great New Year's Eve and I hope that 2011 brings all of us many blessings and lots of laughter!
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
A Gift... For Me???
Hulk did have a fabulous Christmas and scored big in the present department. But mama didn't do so bad either. My parents got me a gift certificate for a massage, and some awesome stationary. They also got me a web cam that I really wanted so we can now Skype with them. So much fun! Monte and Kathy got me a gift card to use anyway I want and Heather got me a gift card to one of my favorite clothing stores. Hulk got me a cool new shirt and a necklace. Yes I was thrilled with all of it!
This year I decided I was also going to get myself a gift. So I gifted myself a gym membership. According to the scales at the doctor's office since Hulk was born almost three years ago I have lost 72 pounds now. I knew I was losing some here and there but until he told me the amount I didn't realize how much it was. While I still need to lose about 50 more pounds I also need to do some serious toning. I'm not kidding when I tell you that when I wave to people I about knock myself out. My flabby arms look like chicken wings. I have to do some toning. So off to the gym I go. We will see if I can get the arm flab under control soon.
That would be a great gift!
This year I decided I was also going to get myself a gift. So I gifted myself a gym membership. According to the scales at the doctor's office since Hulk was born almost three years ago I have lost 72 pounds now. I knew I was losing some here and there but until he told me the amount I didn't realize how much it was. While I still need to lose about 50 more pounds I also need to do some serious toning. I'm not kidding when I tell you that when I wave to people I about knock myself out. My flabby arms look like chicken wings. I have to do some toning. So off to the gym I go. We will see if I can get the arm flab under control soon.
That would be a great gift!
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Christmas
Our Christmas was pretty darn amazing this year. Since my mom died Christmas has been painful for me. In fact every Christmas since she died I have been sick. I think the sickness is brought on as a way for me to avoid the day. While I actually really have had physical symptoms I think it's just been my way to get out of dealing with the day. But not this year! I've been praying for weeks that I would be well and that we could have a fun day. And boy was that prayer answered! It was an amazingly fun weekend!!!
Hulk is just the perfect age! He really understood this year and was just so much fun. From making cookies, to baking Jesus a birthday cake, to opening gifts, to playing with new toys. He was just a blast! We got to spend the whole weekend with my sister too and got lots of time with my best friend Darby and her family. It was just a very relaxing laugh filled weekend! The best Christmas that I've had in years!
Hulk got some really wonderful gifts. I got him an indoor trampoline, a digital camera, and some other little things, my sister got him a kitchen, my dad and cricket got him a picnic table and movies, and Monte and Kathy got him a cute chair, a fun truck, and lots of clothes and pj's. What's crazy is he seemed so excited about all of it. He has spent so much time playing with everything and having a blast.
I hope that you all had a wonderful Christmas too!
Hulk is just the perfect age! He really understood this year and was just so much fun. From making cookies, to baking Jesus a birthday cake, to opening gifts, to playing with new toys. He was just a blast! We got to spend the whole weekend with my sister too and got lots of time with my best friend Darby and her family. It was just a very relaxing laugh filled weekend! The best Christmas that I've had in years!
Hulk got some really wonderful gifts. I got him an indoor trampoline, a digital camera, and some other little things, my sister got him a kitchen, my dad and cricket got him a picnic table and movies, and Monte and Kathy got him a cute chair, a fun truck, and lots of clothes and pj's. What's crazy is he seemed so excited about all of it. He has spent so much time playing with everything and having a blast.
I hope that you all had a wonderful Christmas too!
Thursday, December 23, 2010
It's Cookie Time
When I was a kid my mom always made sugar cookies with me. So now that Hulk is big enough it was time to carry on the tradition. I'll be honest. I was dreading it a little. The mess, the hassle, the mess, did I mention the mess! Yeah I wasn't really looking forward to it. But I decided I had to suck it up and just do it.
And boy am I glad I did! We had SOOOO much fun. Seriously one of the most fun evenings we have ever had. We both laughed so hard. I was crying halfway thru from laughing at him. He kept rolling the dough so seriously and then he would just crack up and say "this is so funny mama." And it was so dang funny and fun and just wonderful!
There was once when I was laughing and started crying that I was a bit overwhelmed with missing my mom. The sad tears quickly turned to happy tears. This child heals my heart. Everytime we have moments like this I'm reminded of how magical the relationship is between a parent and their child. While yes I miss my mom I know she was with us tonight. Laughing a little bit too. And I hope and pray that some day in the very distant future Hulk will have a moment with his own children and know I'm still there too.
I could get a million dollars on Christmas morning and it wouldn't matter. Tonight was the best gift of all!
And boy am I glad I did! We had SOOOO much fun. Seriously one of the most fun evenings we have ever had. We both laughed so hard. I was crying halfway thru from laughing at him. He kept rolling the dough so seriously and then he would just crack up and say "this is so funny mama." And it was so dang funny and fun and just wonderful!
There was once when I was laughing and started crying that I was a bit overwhelmed with missing my mom. The sad tears quickly turned to happy tears. This child heals my heart. Everytime we have moments like this I'm reminded of how magical the relationship is between a parent and their child. While yes I miss my mom I know she was with us tonight. Laughing a little bit too. And I hope and pray that some day in the very distant future Hulk will have a moment with his own children and know I'm still there too.
I could get a million dollars on Christmas morning and it wouldn't matter. Tonight was the best gift of all!
Christmas Countdown
Thank goodness we are on the final Christmas Countdown! I love Christmas day but I hate the week before Christmas. I have affectionatly dubbed it the week of Christmas chaos. It just seems like the week before Christmas is always super chaotic. And even though I try to not let it I always end up stressed out.
There is just a lot to get down at home this week. Extra baking, arranging back up daycare for the kidlet since daycare is closed, the wrapping, the cleaning, the crap we all do before holidays. But the last part of December is also crazy at work too. There are always presents and food to deliver to folks, finishing up year end reports and numbers, blah blah blah. I shouldn't let it but it does stress me out.
I'll be thrilled when it is all over for another year!
There is just a lot to get down at home this week. Extra baking, arranging back up daycare for the kidlet since daycare is closed, the wrapping, the cleaning, the crap we all do before holidays. But the last part of December is also crazy at work too. There are always presents and food to deliver to folks, finishing up year end reports and numbers, blah blah blah. I shouldn't let it but it does stress me out.
I'll be thrilled when it is all over for another year!
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