I have tough decisions to make. It's really time to be realistic about the financial crisis we have been living in for the past year. I've been able to juggle things and rob Peter to pay Paul for quite awhile now. But the house of cards is rapidly crumbling. So tough decisions must be made.
Last night in the middle of my sobbing melt down it hit me. It finally came through loud and clear. Nothing is sacred in this battle. There is nothing other than The Hulk and I that cannot be sacrificed. I have had this idea in my head that I had to keep up. I had to keep the things. The "things" must go. I've already let go of a lot of the material things I used to spend money on. But I've held onto one big thing. The house. And it's time to let go.
This house is just that a house! It is not our home. Our home is wherever we live. And we don't have to live in a house or in this particular house. And we don't need all the things that fill this house up. It's time to put the house on the market, pack up some things, sell some other things, and get something cheaper. I can always buy another house some other time. But this one needs to go.
So I called my real estate agent today. She is coming next week to do the walk thru and to complete the paperwork so we can get this sold. Heather and I are going to spend our three day weekend going through the shop building and getting rid of things or getting them ready to sell. And I'm already feeling better now that the tough decision has been made.
I used to think that kids had to have a big house and yard. I used to think that The Hulk had to have this. But he doesn't. He doesn't care where we live or what it's worth. He cares that he is with his mama and safe and warm. He cares that I can spend time with him because I won't have to work all the time. And I have realized that no "thing" is worth this struggle and stress. It is simply a house. I'll make a home with my boy anywhere this road takes us.