In the recent past I have NOT sprayed Clorox cleaner onto my kitchen floor and then fastened wet towels to my tennis shoes and shuffled around the kitchen rather than actually mopping.
When my kid dumped a huge bag of splenda on the kitchen floor right after I did my shuffle mopping I did NOT just open the patio doors and use the leaf blower to blow it all outside.
I did NOT wake up on Saturday morning convinced it was still Friday and get ready for work.
What have you not done lately?
Showing posts with label Not Me Monday. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Not Me Monday. Show all posts
Monday, August 23, 2010
Monday, July 12, 2010
Not Me Monday!
I promise you that I am NOT terrified of snakes! Since I'm NOT terrified of snakes I would not have freaked out at finding one in my jungle of a flower bed. Because I'm NOT terrified of snakes I did NOT have my toddler pick up the snake and put it in the trash can. He does NOT love snakes and think they are the coolest thing ever (after dinosaurs of course). I then did NOT call the neighbor kid over to kill the snake. I would NEVER involve children in the removal or murder of snakes. That is so NOT like me.
I did NOT write down a photography clients information on a diaper I had in my car. I was NOT caught without a notepad because I'm always prepared for work calls. Once home I did NOT place said diaper on my child and then remember later that I needed to copy the information. I then did NOT have to hold my child down so I could copy all the important details off of his butt.
What did you NOT do this week?
I did NOT write down a photography clients information on a diaper I had in my car. I was NOT caught without a notepad because I'm always prepared for work calls. Once home I did NOT place said diaper on my child and then remember later that I needed to copy the information. I then did NOT have to hold my child down so I could copy all the important details off of his butt.
What did you NOT do this week?
Monday, May 24, 2010
Not Me Monday!
I did NOT find a dinosaur hidden in my dresser drawer one day this week. It did NOT make me laugh out loud. And there is NO way I left it in there so I could chuckle again the next day.
My child is NOT obsessed with his "music shirt" as he calls it. It is actually a shirt with a guitar on it that says "I'm with the band". He is NOT so obsessed with it that I actually let him wear it two days in a row because I didn't want to deal with a temper tantrum when we were already running late.
What have you NOT done lately?
My child is NOT obsessed with his "music shirt" as he calls it. It is actually a shirt with a guitar on it that says "I'm with the band". He is NOT so obsessed with it that I actually let him wear it two days in a row because I didn't want to deal with a temper tantrum when we were already running late.
What have you NOT done lately?
Monday, May 17, 2010
Not Me Monday
Wow I haven't done a not me Monday in awhile. Life just gets in the way of blogging sometimes.... So here goes.
I did NOT sit down to pay bills last night and cry. I did NOT cry tears of joy that after paying all the bills and putting $50 in savings there was still $37 in my checking account! I would NOT get so emotional over such a thing.
I did NOT let Hulk sleep on the bathroom floor because he wanted to and I really really wanted a break from having him in my bed.
I am NOT about sick and tired of having our house disrupted from all the flooding/construction issues. I am NOT considering doing the new sheetrock myself.
I did NOT play memory with Hulk 804 times over the weekend because it was raining and we couldn't go out and play. I did NOT explain to him 714 times that the watermelon and strawberries don't match. Just because they are both fruit does NOT mean they are a match.
I did NOT realize after game 21 that I have a ridiculous competitive side that I need to work on. He is 2 and I should NOT be thinking about how I'm gonna beat him at a game.
What have you NOT done lately.
I did NOT sit down to pay bills last night and cry. I did NOT cry tears of joy that after paying all the bills and putting $50 in savings there was still $37 in my checking account! I would NOT get so emotional over such a thing.
I did NOT let Hulk sleep on the bathroom floor because he wanted to and I really really wanted a break from having him in my bed.
I am NOT about sick and tired of having our house disrupted from all the flooding/construction issues. I am NOT considering doing the new sheetrock myself.
I did NOT play memory with Hulk 804 times over the weekend because it was raining and we couldn't go out and play. I did NOT explain to him 714 times that the watermelon and strawberries don't match. Just because they are both fruit does NOT mean they are a match.
I did NOT realize after game 21 that I have a ridiculous competitive side that I need to work on. He is 2 and I should NOT be thinking about how I'm gonna beat him at a game.
What have you NOT done lately.
Monday, April 26, 2010
Not Me Monday!
This weekend I hosted an all day Spring photo session for families. It was a blast! And since my child and my best friend Darby's children are so adorable and wellbehaved at all times we of course photographed them. We wanted a picture my guy and her twins together. So we stuck them in a wagon. Since my child is so gentle there is NO way he threw Darby's little boy out of the wagon head first! And there is NO way I captured the moment right before the quick exit out of the wagon. My child would NEVER laugh and smile right before throwing an unsuspecting baby onto the ground! NOT MY CHILD!!!
And trust me there is NO way that I screamed Oh God at the top of my lungs as I watched that precious little boy fly thru the air to the ground. There is NO way I would have over reacted like that. NOT ME!
And trust me there is NO way that I screamed Oh God at the top of my lungs as I watched that precious little boy fly thru the air to the ground. There is NO way I would have over reacted like that. NOT ME!
Monday, April 19, 2010
Not Me Monday!
This week I did NOT go out to eat with my family at my favorite Mexican restaurant. Even though the staff said numerous times "This plate is hot" I did NOT lean forward and have my stomach bump the plate. Today I do NOT have a burn mark on my stomach from said hot plate!
I did NOT take my child on a four hour car trip and consider dropping him off somewhere along the route just to be free of the nonstop yelling, screaming, fit throwing. He did NOT act a fool for 3 1/2 hours of the 4 hours in the car. I did NOT turn up the radio and sing loudly to try and ignore the antics occurring in the backseat!
What did you NOT do this week?
I did NOT take my child on a four hour car trip and consider dropping him off somewhere along the route just to be free of the nonstop yelling, screaming, fit throwing. He did NOT act a fool for 3 1/2 hours of the 4 hours in the car. I did NOT turn up the radio and sing loudly to try and ignore the antics occurring in the backseat!
What did you NOT do this week?
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Not Me... Tuesday???
There is NO way that I forgot it was Monday! I would NOT miss a Monday and then have to post Not me Monday on a Not Me Tuesday. That's crazy!
So where to even begin this week. This has NOT been a crazy weird week for me. I did NOT spend half of my day at work being professional and responsible. I did NOT give a presentation and attend a court hearing. After completing these tasks I was NOT stopped by a professional man who asked me if my child got stickers for Christmas. When I answered yes he did NOT say that it appeared my child had stuck said stickers to my butt!!!! I did NOT have 5 easter bunny stickers on my butt for half of a work day and look like a fool!!!
As if that wouldn't be enough I did NOT take my child with me grocery shopping. We did NOT spend almost an hour in the store going up and down every aisle. When finished I did NOT notice when placing the child in the car that one of his shoes was missing!!! Therefore I did NOT spend another hour looking for said shoe.
What did you NOT do this week?
So where to even begin this week. This has NOT been a crazy weird week for me. I did NOT spend half of my day at work being professional and responsible. I did NOT give a presentation and attend a court hearing. After completing these tasks I was NOT stopped by a professional man who asked me if my child got stickers for Christmas. When I answered yes he did NOT say that it appeared my child had stuck said stickers to my butt!!!! I did NOT have 5 easter bunny stickers on my butt for half of a work day and look like a fool!!!
As if that wouldn't be enough I did NOT take my child with me grocery shopping. We did NOT spend almost an hour in the store going up and down every aisle. When finished I did NOT notice when placing the child in the car that one of his shoes was missing!!! Therefore I did NOT spend another hour looking for said shoe.
What did you NOT do this week?
Monday, March 29, 2010
Not Me Monday
I promise you I did NOT go into my bathroom and lock the door the other day and pray to God that he give me enough strength to deal with my child kindly before bedtime. I did NOT pray that he help me manage the tantrums and not listening in a gentle and loving way. I then did NOT scream at the top of my lungs, "Quit banging on this damn door I'm trying to pray!!!"
I did NOT misplace my keys at my office. I did NOT recruit my coworkers to help me find the lost keys. We did NOT look everywhere for at least 30 minutes. And we did NOT find the keys in the refrigerator! Who puts keys in the fridge!!!
What have you NOT done lately???
I did NOT misplace my keys at my office. I did NOT recruit my coworkers to help me find the lost keys. We did NOT look everywhere for at least 30 minutes. And we did NOT find the keys in the refrigerator! Who puts keys in the fridge!!!
What have you NOT done lately???
Monday, March 15, 2010
Not Me Monday!
This week I did NOT misplace the keys to my office. I did NOT search my desk, filing cabinet, purse, coat, and have my co-workers do the same. I then did NOT find my keys in the refrigerator!!!
I did NOT find our puppy in my kitchen sink.
I also did NOT find a bunch of shredded paper under Hulk's bed this weekend. My child would NOT be tearing up books and hiding the paper from me.
I did NOT drag my toddler into the post office, wait in line for 20 minutes, get to the front of the line only to realize I had left my purse in the car!
What did you NOT do this week?
I did NOT find our puppy in my kitchen sink.
I also did NOT find a bunch of shredded paper under Hulk's bed this weekend. My child would NOT be tearing up books and hiding the paper from me.
I did NOT drag my toddler into the post office, wait in line for 20 minutes, get to the front of the line only to realize I had left my purse in the car!
What did you NOT do this week?
Monday, March 8, 2010
Not Me Monday!
While my child was taking his bath I was NOT sitting in the hallway folding laundry when I heard a loud bang. I peeked into the door to see what was going on and did NOT find my child sitting on the potty chair in the bathtub! And since he wasn't doing that he also did NOT pee in the potty chair that he was NOT sitting on in the tub.
As you can see he he also did NOT think this was very funny!
This weekend I did NOT put my little boy to work. We did NOT fill his wagon with rocks and move them to another part of the yard. He did NOT get sweaty from all the loading and loading of rocks and ask for a "dink peaseeee". I did NOT feel a tad bit guilty making him work. I was also NOT just a little impressed at how helpful he can be.
What did you NOT do this week?
As you can see he he also did NOT think this was very funny!
This weekend I did NOT put my little boy to work. We did NOT fill his wagon with rocks and move them to another part of the yard. He did NOT get sweaty from all the loading and loading of rocks and ask for a "dink peaseeee". I did NOT feel a tad bit guilty making him work. I was also NOT just a little impressed at how helpful he can be.
What did you NOT do this week?
Monday, March 1, 2010
Not Me Monday!
This week I did NOT feel like a high school girl again doing my hair every morning. I did NOT actually pull my hair to my nose and smell it and love my shampoo even more. I did NOT realize that when you only wear your hair in a ponytail you miss out on the delicious yummy scent of strawberry shampoo!
I did NOT laugh with my aunts so much this weekend that my abs hurt today!
This weekend when I wasn't laughing I did NOT eat way to much junk food. I did NOT let my child eat way to much junk food. And I do NOT find it incredibly adorable when he looks up at you crunches up his face and says cookie peeeeseeee! My child would NOT be a cookie beggar!
I did NOT fall asleep curled up with my coughing son on the couch at 6:00 last night only to awaken at 3:00 in the morning wide awake! Since that could NOT have happened I would NOT be writing this post in the middle of the night!
What did you NOT do this week?
I did NOT laugh with my aunts so much this weekend that my abs hurt today!
This weekend when I wasn't laughing I did NOT eat way to much junk food. I did NOT let my child eat way to much junk food. And I do NOT find it incredibly adorable when he looks up at you crunches up his face and says cookie peeeeseeee! My child would NOT be a cookie beggar!
I did NOT fall asleep curled up with my coughing son on the couch at 6:00 last night only to awaken at 3:00 in the morning wide awake! Since that could NOT have happened I would NOT be writing this post in the middle of the night!
What did you NOT do this week?
Monday, February 22, 2010
Not Me Monday!
This week I promise that I did NOT let my son wear one sock with Elmo on it and one sock with Cookie Monster on it just because he wanted too. I did NOT pick my battles and decide that mismatched Seasame Street socks just weren't worth a fit.
I also did NOT get dressed and go to work and realize half way through my day that I was wearing one brown shoe and one black shoe. YIKES!
And I did NOT make a meatloaf for dinner one evening and drop it on the floor as I was putting it in the oven. I then did not just scrape off the top layer that touched the floor and cook the rest. Yuck!
What did you NOT do this week?
I also did NOT get dressed and go to work and realize half way through my day that I was wearing one brown shoe and one black shoe. YIKES!
And I did NOT make a meatloaf for dinner one evening and drop it on the floor as I was putting it in the oven. I then did not just scrape off the top layer that touched the floor and cook the rest. Yuck!
What did you NOT do this week?
Monday, February 15, 2010
Not Me Monday!
Oh you all thought I forgot it was Monday didn't you? Well I can assure you that I know it is Monday. However, I obviously do not know how to schedule posts correctly. Because while this was supposed to post this morning I noticed that it hadn't. Let's just say I did NOT schedule the post for the wrong date....
I did NOT happen to find my child playing with dog food this week. He would NOT have tons of toys but still find dog food to be an enjoyable play thing.
I did NOT keep Sylas happy in the car on the way to the big city by feeding him cheese its and ice chips the whole way.
I also did NOT drive home very quickly in an effort to make it home before he woke up.
I did NOT forget a load of clothes in the dryer for two days. By then they were NOT so wrinkled that I just rewashed them rather than iron them.
So what did you NOT do this week?
I did NOT happen to find my child playing with dog food this week. He would NOT have tons of toys but still find dog food to be an enjoyable play thing.
I did NOT keep Sylas happy in the car on the way to the big city by feeding him cheese its and ice chips the whole way.
I also did NOT drive home very quickly in an effort to make it home before he woke up.
I did NOT forget a load of clothes in the dryer for two days. By then they were NOT so wrinkled that I just rewashed them rather than iron them.
So what did you NOT do this week?
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Not Me Monday
Wow Monday is almost over! I can assure you that I did NOT forget that it was Monday and time for this post. I'm NOT a little busy and distracted by things like days of the week.
I have NOT been cleaning my house like crazy in an effort to keep it show ready if people come to see it. I promise that I do NOT hate the time spent cleaning. I also do NOT love that the house looks so nice. I do NOT wish that it could always look like this with only half the effort.
I did NOT catch myself at an important meeting for work spacing of and humming a little song. If that happened I would NOT have been humming Sing Sing a Song by Big Bird. I'm way cooler than that!
I did NOT wear a pair of pants to work one day and take them off and throw them in the hamper. A couple days later when I was running late and running low on clean work pants I did NOT fish that same pair out of the hamper. About 10 that morning I can assure you that I did NOT feel something funny and look down to see a pair of under wear sticking out of the bottom of my pants. Yikes! I'm sure glad that did NOT happen to me!!!!
So what did you NOT do this week????
Jessie
I have NOT been cleaning my house like crazy in an effort to keep it show ready if people come to see it. I promise that I do NOT hate the time spent cleaning. I also do NOT love that the house looks so nice. I do NOT wish that it could always look like this with only half the effort.
I did NOT catch myself at an important meeting for work spacing of and humming a little song. If that happened I would NOT have been humming Sing Sing a Song by Big Bird. I'm way cooler than that!
I did NOT wear a pair of pants to work one day and take them off and throw them in the hamper. A couple days later when I was running late and running low on clean work pants I did NOT fish that same pair out of the hamper. About 10 that morning I can assure you that I did NOT feel something funny and look down to see a pair of under wear sticking out of the bottom of my pants. Yikes! I'm sure glad that did NOT happen to me!!!!
So what did you NOT do this week????
Jessie
Monday, February 1, 2010
Not Me Monday
This week I did NOT watch my child slip and fall in the garage and fall right into a cardboard box. I did NOT run for my camera rather than help him up quickly. It was NOT to cute to pass up the photo op!
I did NOT load the groceries into the car and place hulk in his car seat beside the bags of groceries. I did NOT consider how he has developed go go gadget arms that can stretch to crazy lengths. So when I turned around to look at him as we were about half way home I did NOT find him scarfing down blueberries at a super human rate of speed. He had not consumed more than half of the package! I promise you I did NOT spend a good portion of that evening changing poop filled diapers.
I did NOT leave a rather inappropriate silly voicemail message for my friend the other day only to recieve a call back from "Michael" who is not my friend and did not think my voicemail was silly or entertaining in the least.
What did you not do this week?
I did NOT load the groceries into the car and place hulk in his car seat beside the bags of groceries. I did NOT consider how he has developed go go gadget arms that can stretch to crazy lengths. So when I turned around to look at him as we were about half way home I did NOT find him scarfing down blueberries at a super human rate of speed. He had not consumed more than half of the package! I promise you I did NOT spend a good portion of that evening changing poop filled diapers.
I did NOT leave a rather inappropriate silly voicemail message for my friend the other day only to recieve a call back from "Michael" who is not my friend and did not think my voicemail was silly or entertaining in the least.
What did you not do this week?
Monday, January 11, 2010
Not Me Monday!
I did NOT forget to order The Hulk his special I have a big bootie diapers online and have to buy diapers that were too small for him at the local store.
If that happened my child did NOT look like a plumber for a few days before the appropriately sized diapers arrived.
In an effort to save time I do NOT prepare most of our dinners the night before so they just have to be heated up the next evening. I did NOT prepare a casserole late one night this week and then go to bed only to find the casserole sitting on the kitchen counter in the morning. I would NOT be so wasteful or forgetful.
What did you NOT do this week?
Clickin Mama
If that happened my child did NOT look like a plumber for a few days before the appropriately sized diapers arrived.
In an effort to save time I do NOT prepare most of our dinners the night before so they just have to be heated up the next evening. I did NOT prepare a casserole late one night this week and then go to bed only to find the casserole sitting on the kitchen counter in the morning. I would NOT be so wasteful or forgetful.
What did you NOT do this week?
Clickin Mama
Monday, December 28, 2009
Not Me Monday!
I have NOT spent the last four days stuck in this house. I do NOT feel a little bit crazy. I have NOT made a list of all the things I want to do in the outside world once we ccan be free!
I am NOT overwhelmed at all by the huge amounts of new things that have found a new home here. The dump trucks and tunnels, the books and balls. While appreciative for all the gifts bestowed on my child I'm NOT also trying to figure out where in the heck to put it all.
I did NOT cry when my sister left yesterday. After 4 days with her I didn't feel really lonely as I watched her gun it over the mountain of snow at the end of the drive and escape. I did NOT wave like a fool as I bawled.
I did NOT listen to Elmo sing HOT HOT HOT for about 7 hours over the past four days. I also do NOT know how to do the silly squirel dance! That's my story and I'm sticking too it!
Clickin Mama
I am NOT overwhelmed at all by the huge amounts of new things that have found a new home here. The dump trucks and tunnels, the books and balls. While appreciative for all the gifts bestowed on my child I'm NOT also trying to figure out where in the heck to put it all.
I did NOT cry when my sister left yesterday. After 4 days with her I didn't feel really lonely as I watched her gun it over the mountain of snow at the end of the drive and escape. I did NOT wave like a fool as I bawled.
I did NOT listen to Elmo sing HOT HOT HOT for about 7 hours over the past four days. I also do NOT know how to do the silly squirel dance! That's my story and I'm sticking too it!
Clickin Mama
Monday, December 21, 2009
Not Me Monday!
In an effort to multi-task while also providing my child with stimulating educational activities I did NOT place him in his high chair and give him art supplies to use while I made a meat loaf.
I also would NOT be turning the scribbled on papers he created as Christmas cards. I'm NOT masquerading behind cheesy kid art because I'm broke and don't wanna spend money on cards.
I did NOT fall in my kitchen this morning in a puddle of water. The Hulk seems to enjoy getting water out of the refrigerator door. While fun for him Mommy could break a hip. Nice!
What did you NOT do this week?
Clickin Mama
I also would NOT be turning the scribbled on papers he created as Christmas cards. I'm NOT masquerading behind cheesy kid art because I'm broke and don't wanna spend money on cards.
I did NOT fall in my kitchen this morning in a puddle of water. The Hulk seems to enjoy getting water out of the refrigerator door. While fun for him Mommy could break a hip. Nice!
What did you NOT do this week?
Clickin Mama
Monday, December 14, 2009
Not Me Monday!
I did NOT leave my computer turned off all weekend to just enjoy time with my family! My Dad is NOT in town for his first visit in months and I haven't just been spending time with him and The Hulk and Heather.
I did NOT scream like crazy when Heather graduated yesterday. Hearing her name called and seeing her walk across the stage did NOT make me cry.
I did NOT let The Hulk eat insane amounts of mac and cheese yesterday because I was just thrilled to see him eating something. He has NOT be avoiding all food since having this last infection.
And I am NOT at work today even though I have a low grade fever and no voice. There is NO way I used up all my sick days on my sick kid and am now stuck working when I am sick. Never! Not ME!!!
Clickin Mama
I did NOT scream like crazy when Heather graduated yesterday. Hearing her name called and seeing her walk across the stage did NOT make me cry.
I did NOT let The Hulk eat insane amounts of mac and cheese yesterday because I was just thrilled to see him eating something. He has NOT be avoiding all food since having this last infection.
And I am NOT at work today even though I have a low grade fever and no voice. There is NO way I used up all my sick days on my sick kid and am now stuck working when I am sick. Never! Not ME!!!
Clickin Mama
Monday, November 30, 2009
Not Me Monday!
This week I did NOT cry over broken tiles or sewer water! I wouldn't waste tears over silly things like that!
I did NOT put my toddler in the empty bath tub at my cousin's house so I could run downstairs and get some things without worrying about him falling down the stairs. Since The Hulk can't crawl out of the tub that would NOT be a great way to trap him while I packed our things.
I did NOT open our suitcase and just place all the clothes directly into the washer when we got home.
I did NOT put The Hulk' bath toys in the dishwasher to sanitize them rather than washing them all by hand.
What did you NOT do this week?
Clickin Mama
I did NOT put my toddler in the empty bath tub at my cousin's house so I could run downstairs and get some things without worrying about him falling down the stairs. Since The Hulk can't crawl out of the tub that would NOT be a great way to trap him while I packed our things.
I did NOT open our suitcase and just place all the clothes directly into the washer when we got home.
I did NOT put The Hulk' bath toys in the dishwasher to sanitize them rather than washing them all by hand.
What did you NOT do this week?
Clickin Mama
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