I had an interesting conversation with another single mom today. She shared with me how difficult it is for her on occasion to handle the judgement she feels as a single mom. I was blown away by this because I have not had any negative experiences or felt judged while single parenting. But there is a big difference. I'm a single mom through adoption and she is a single mother through birth. The difference is the "sex" issue!
This is so frustrating to me. It saddens me that this friend of mine often feels uncomfortable at church because of the judgement! Of all places she should feel comforted and supported in the church. It is not our place to judge. God does that. Children are never the sin, the mistake, the punishment. Children are a blessing.
I'm fortunate in that prior to adopting The Hulk as a single mom I had months of classes, a home study, financial analysis, etc. I had a plan. And it is still difficult at times! I have so much respect for single women that birth their babies. Often they believe that they will have a partner to assist them, and often the pregnancy is a big surprise. I can't imagine how tough that would be!
I just don't think that any parent should be judged. We are all different. But ultimately parents want the same thing for their children, health and happiness! I'm thinking that instead of judging folks ought to offer to help a single mom out. Sit next to her in church and offer to help with the little ones, offer to babysit so she could go on a walk alone or out to dinner, open the door for her, and most importantly when you see a mom doing a good job, tell her so.
Clickin Mama
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